How do I not let this eat me up?

you've taken enough beating don't put yourself though more. you have said all the reasoning why you shouldn't let it eat you up. if friends are acquired tastes express the bitter taste left in your mouth when in her presence when acting such. If she's willing to state her opinions why should you hold back on how you feel. Friends should be enabling the best out of each other sometimes they won't like what they hear and will part.